Brown eyed girl

good stuff

Wed, 31 Aug 2005 07:20:18 GMT

wow so i'm actually spending the night at troy's house with marco and chris
troy's kitten is like the cute-est and crazy-est thing like ever made ... i really just want to steal it.. maybe i will... don't tell
stuff's starting to fall into place in some weird ways... i don't really know how that works out but i hope it will

i'm on marco's laptop because I love the feel that the keys have under my fingers
i need to know from my friends that what I say to them is left.. with them. i know most people think that they're doing something good to redirect what their friend says to the person that they like or (more often) the one they don't like... but i would always rather talk to the person myself. I donno... i hate saying "don't tell anyone this" because it almost doubts the amount of trust i have with them but it seems like i have to say it more to make sure that.. they don't.
ahh this is sooo stupid but everything at one point fell apart and it... it just killed

i want to know i can trust you, and that i can call you at 2am and have you say "hey, what's up" and listen... just be there... and what i say.. you will know that i have said it to no one other then you because i trust you and because i am giving you this part of me to keep safe
i want to know that if i ask for a hug or just for your hand that you will know i need you at that moment and will be there for me
i want to know when we talk the silence is understanding.. not empty, because we understand each other

when i look into you eyes i want you to know that when i say "i love you" i mean it, because you mean the world to me

this is what i need of you friend, these are my conditions... if you don't believe you can do what i ask of you, then warn me before i give you a part of me

Tue, 19 Oct 2004 22:24:25 GMT

i'm making my lj friends only so you'll know if i kept you cause i'm gonna do a real post in like 10 seconds

and if not...
bye!

80's strings amplified

Sat, 16 Oct 2004 16:03:26 GMT

lost another one

arg, it's an infection. it spreads taking over wonderful people and then shows them life through these warped, gloomy goggles. they cloud everything and the next thing you know; they're someone else. i wish you didn't change just because he happens to be your friend, but i guess that's how easy you are, huh? why did i have to know you when you were so much... better and now you disappoint me with how you treat people. you're following him and he tainted you in a way i do not want to see.

you were so rude; you are so both so different

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, hc tonight and i wanna see how awesome all mi amigas look (i'll make

i talked to him (lets see... he needs a name; vic [haha i have my reasons]) so anyway, we talked on the phone last night tell like 1 am and then we had to start saying things like "yesterday" and "today" even though it still felt like friday. wow i wish i could do so many things i can't but ... it doesn't matter cause he's still just; great.

oh my; queen ... <3 his voice is just so different from all these "singers" now a days. (as mck would say "you're not singers, you're an instrument") i love music so much; i love how the strings make the harmony behind the melody and then these corn-y guitar part kicks in and the drums to. "i touch my tears with your lips" and then he busts it out "who wants to live forever, who wants to live forever" with the strings and everything. it's so powerful to hear yourself be a part of this sound, the bass echos inside of you and the harmonies between the instruments make this rich, deep sound. it hits you cause you're helping to make this music and .... it's amazing that with some people and instruments, this beautiful or dark or dramatic or light or ANYTHING music pour out filling up the air.

yeah i know, band geek; w/e. people have their "things" and if mine happens to be band and music then i don't see how that automatically makes me less of a quality person. well fuck you cause i love it

haha i bet i'll fall asleep tonight cause i'm already tired, oh yeah, i'll take loads of pictures and post'em later to give you a re-cap on the night

Tue, 12 Oct 2004 03:38:08 GMT

you= wonderful, you have no idea how great you are to me <3

:\

... (other) you= i don't know what to do because it's not my fault and i wont "give in" because i'm better then that; i'll miss you but i'm starting to get that nothing mattered to you and you don't care anymore... so i guess that's what i'll have to do
('<3 upside-down' from you forever)

found some forget-me-not's in my mind

Tue, 21 Sep 2004 23:34:29 GMT

Sunset the morning we had a huge thunderstorm at band camp and Selena, Jen and I got caught out in the rain underneath an old picnic table

That's what it's all about, remembering, knowing that at one point i didn't care about anything other than how wonderful everything became within that time.

Life is full of suffering and we must acknowledge that to move on

"i like boy bands.. wopper head"

Thu, 16 Sep 2004 03:29:46 GMT

i feel good; glad i got that all said cause people need to know what's going on with their friends <3 no matter what; that is, ride-side-up

on the othe hand i herd something that made me wanna just talk some reason into someone

ahhhh highschool drama

fuck what you know; you don't know anything

yeah... random

oh yeah that's right..... EVERYONE'S TALKING ABOUT HOMECOMING!!!!

taking advice from jack

Tue, 14 Sep 2004 04:32:48 GMT

quit trying to be someone else

you the poster of everything i hate:

check out my outsides there aint nothin in here-
comes another one
just like the other one
looking at himself and wishing he was someone else
because the posters on the wall that don't look like him
he ties it up, he tucks it in, he pulls it back and gives a grin
laughing at himself because he knows he loved at all

you should know you're not loved at all

draining

Thu, 09 Sep 2004 03:42:32 GMT

school makes me turn into the air that smells like fall: still and dry and cold. it's so forign after all the days of sun you can taste durring summer.

i wish people would put up a fucking effort. i hate knowing that the only reason i get to talk to people/ get to know them is because I came up to them. or even worse, someone who says that you're their friend but then someone else comes along and they ditch to hang out with them AND then come back when they leave.

i really wish people WANTED to just come up and talk to me or at least try so i don't feel like i pull out all the fucking effort for all my relationships.

i'm going to be putting everything i have into school or music so if my friends don't start useing any effort then i don't know what more i can do.

school makes me nothing, i become nothing and i hate thinking about what it's going to do to everyone i love

everyone i wished just did the same

my schedule!!

Wed, 25 Aug 2004 04:03:41 GMT

0 Jazz band
1 Spanish II (Smith)
2 Wind Ens. (Mckinlay)
3 World History AP (Oglesby)
4 Eng. Honors II (Costello)
5 Chem. AP (Davis)
L3
6 Pre-cal (Call)

please tell me is you have classes w/ me!!!!!

hmmm....

Tue, 10 Aug 2004 05:36:53 GMT

can't stop thinking about you and i don't know why

i feel like purple and sunshine; you make me feel like purple and sunshine

taking ideas from incubus:
~ "how do you do it? make me feel like i do"
~ "i wish you were here"

the concert was real fun and it totally made me love lights whaha

i wish i knew what i really mean

Fri, 06 Aug 2004 06:06:48 GMT

when you're strong
that's what you have to be
when you're alone
it's because you're strong

****

knowing that the only person
who ever knew who you were
got pushed away long ago
can linger above you for so long

feeling like they're so far away
is simply knowing where they are
where you put them
so vary long ago

realizing who you've become
finally seeing the place in you
where something used to beat
used to cry and smile

****

when you're strong
that's what you have to be
as for being alone...
that's just who you are

yeah i have nothing to think about other than yeah..... i had fun tonight chillin with a friend though. i think sometimes i can be crazy and i think that's what i was... o well.

wrote a really bad poem but sometimes that's what i feel like... just being a really bad poem.

everything's lemers

Thu, 05 Aug 2004 05:46:30 GMT

so yeah... just got back from my hiking/backpacking trip and yeah... it was great

it really makes you realize how unimportant things like the internet and fashion are when it comes to who you are

you know/like people for who they are and they know/like you for who you are

everything's so different because the only things you have is food, people and nature

there are so many things effecting us that we have no idea about

it sounds so cliche to say that i changed, but i did

i know who i am and that's who you'll see

haha me all n-a-t-u-r-a-l and that's all there is

i'd tell you all about everything that happened, but you wouldn't understand anyone because they live away from here and yeah.... glad to be back but i'll miss everything <3

Harry Potter was always better looking in my mind

Thu, 22 Jul 2004 17:41:56 GMT

and also

you are violet
#EE82EE

Your dominant hues are red and blue. You're confident and like showing people new ideas. You play well with others and can be very influential if you want to be.

Your saturation level is lower than average - You don't stress out over things and don't understand people who do. Finishing projects may sometimes be a challenge, but you schedule time as you see fit and the important things all happen in the end, even if not everyone sees your grand master plan.

Your outlook on life is bright. You see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything.

the spacefem.com html color quiz

Tue, 20 Jul 2004 00:24:58 GMT

me and katie went to the zoo; katie=sister

just for mark <3 (and also; i love this pic i took cause i got the snake to look @ me)

ps. thursday thursday thursday thursday thursday thursday thursday thursday thursday thursday (the day not the band haha)

please someone, say goodbye

by the way, i waited for you and this was what i got

<3

Fri, 16 Jul 2004 06:14:03 GMT

all that you love will be carried away

Fri, 16 Jul 2004 05:30:30 GMT

I am the Berlin wall
You will only see one side
Or die trying

I am the Cuban Missile Crisis
I got rid of all my weapons
Now leave my island

I am the Vietnam War
I am led by politicians
Not generals

I am the Berlin wall
I’m lined with armed soldiers
And I’m not worth it

So this morning I worked out with my dad, we say Spiderman 2, got a smoothie @ Jamba Jucie and tonight I went out for dinner at Cutters in Seattle w/ my parents and grandparents and had the best seafood ever. It was great.

Views on Government

Thu, 15 Jul 2004 01:11:32 GMT

Separation of Church and State

So as you all know the issue of gay marriage has been coming up within the political community. Although being recently refused by the Supreme Court, the thought of having an amendment banning gay marriage is still a basis in the 2004 election and has caught the eye of most ethnic believers around the country. Bush, based on his religious backgrounds, has brought up the idea that marriage is a bond that should be shared between only a male and a female. This idea appears in most religious settings and is shared by those who follow them.

This amendment is crossing a boundary line that was established when our country blossomed and that is the Separation of Church and State. We do not pray in our public schools and we do not promote or deny any religious ideas in our schools. Based on the founding of our country, we should have the right to choose how we live our life and not have to be ruled by the government when it comes to matters such as religion. This is, after all, the reason that settlers left Europe’s enforced existence and made their home where they could practice as they please. For the government to be able to tell it’s people what to do and not to do, based on a religion, is most certainly crossing that line.

Whether the religious people in our country agree or disagree with this is irrelevant. They are allowed the right to practice what they want and live life how they want, then why shouldn’t everyone else? If they disagree with the way someone else is living their life, it does not give them the right to dictate them.

Where There Should Be a Line

When it comes to the arguments about the rights gays/lesbians should be allowed it should come to whether the decisions made by them effect or harm other people. Gay marriage does not harm anyone but another right they are fighting for is the ability for gay couples to adopt children.

In statistics and experience, growing children need both a female and male figure in their life. This is why the best candidate for adopting a child is a female/male couple. Skeptics may say “What is the couple split and it turns out to be a single parent raising them?” Well, there’s no telling the future but at least the fact that the child was given to a stable male/female couple at the time is the best that they can do. While there is no doubting the love available for the child from a gay couple or even a single parent, a growing child needs a balanced influence from both male and female. This doesn’t mean that gays should not be allowed; only that they should be lower priority because of the effects being raised with only female (or female& female) or male (or male& male) aspects can have for the child.

Vote

In other thoughts, the mere fact that we as a people can discus this is phenomenal. You have no idea what you take for granted every day. We have a freedom and economic strength like no other country. The only way to insure that our country stays controlled by the people is to vote. We have the right and still less then an estimated 20% actually vote in our country. The worst is when I hear people who didn’t vote complain about the way our country is run; IF YOU HAVE THE ABILITY AND YOU DON’T VOTE, YOU SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO CRITISIZE THE WAY OUR COUNTRY IS RUN.

So many people have died for our right to vote and are still dieing, so whether you believe in that reason they are dying or why they did die; vote and use your right.

never figure it out

Mon, 12 Jul 2004 02:13:35 GMT

Got back from my grandparents house and I am just blah... all the time. When I got there I didn't feel good so I slept. I woke up and couldn't even look at myself I was just so disgusted for no reason. With that thought I went back to bed.

Today I woke up at 8 and took random naps around my grandparent’s house. I still fell sick w/ myself [and anyone who’s going to say I’m whining just shut the fuck up, this is my place to speak] I couldn’t even look in a mirror and my mother and I spent the drive home in silence.

We took my brother to ‘Treck’ which is an outdoor camp program that lasts 2 weeks. Bottom line: no Sean for 2 weeks.

I loved the 4^th at my grandparents. These people spent up to $15,000 on fireworks and it was stellar. There’s like 4 different houses to watch and we get our own private show (parking included).

I have some random pictures here too; enjoy.

piano <3

flowers for my grandmother because she has breast cancer

me with my natural hair (curly not crazy colored)

my lil' cousin Andy

beebe bridge (the side that wasn't on fire)

andy and my uncle bill as... Jesus

me with these trix glasses i found

deadman's island

my grandparent's dock and my brother (sean) and i "playing" on it

my grandmothers garden

Jazz and a Gun Rack

Sun, 04 Jul 2004 03:17:35 GMT

So i'm down here at my Grandparents house and I'm chillin w/ my cousin. Anywhoo, my mother and I decide to go get groceries. To do this we used the old truck known as 'Ol' Bessy' which, by the name, should describe how old and hick-like it actually is. The real problem with the truck is that it's a clutch and my mother didn't remember how to drive one. So we're on the road and she's trying to shift and not hit anyone... it was sooo funny. On the way back I finally figured out how to work the am/fm radio. Basically the only station we could get was this jazz station (which i had no problem with because I love jazz and I even play it) but my mother, in all her wisdom, points out the fact that we were listening to classy jazz in a car with a gun rack.

Then when we got to the local food market called Paterson's and for some reason they had this blow up-jumpy-thing (like the ones at the fair) and I, of course haha, had no problem with it being there. So I get my mother to come jump with me and we're in there with like 5 children and it was awesome!

... yeah then when I got back I was sleepy (i woke up at like 7:30 and shut the fuck up it's summer) so my room here is the gym over the place where you keep the cars (i just ate and i don't feel like spelling something wrong haha) so... anywhoo when i got back i was tired but i don't have by bed blown up yet (hah that just sounds funny) so i just kinda fell asleep on the floor on this excersise mat.

And (!!) as you can see, it's a very eventful place haha, and by the way (if you read this) ;
Katie: I MISS YOU ALREADY(you're coming over when i get back)
Mark: I NEED MUSIC (we need to play as soon as i get back)
Troy: I'M COMING OVER SOON (we're gonna hang)
Evan: COME BACK AND, YES, I MISS YOU (haha i did as you said now come back)

Now these words from my cousin... take it away Tommy;

now thank you very much aleta. so, how are all of you young women and men out in radio land doing tonight? well, we dont have a lot going on in the world today, so i guess ill just jump right on into the personal segment of the show were i discuss and/or whine about the days happenings. so, im over here at this crazy place called hourse head bay and hanging out with aleta and sean and enjoying the killer water and teh scenery. so, sean (aleta's little bro) took a hardcore lesson this morning to make us better at the crazy sport known as wakeboarding. it was freakin awesome. so, we did that for quite a while before hitting the hot tub and wishing there was better scenery (women) and, yea... well, now we are going to have to take a quick comercial break, but before we go, i would like to give a quick shout out to our sponsor, www.stupid-trash.net if you havent ever been there, it might change your life. we'll be right back...

... and we are back. well, i guess i dont really have anything left to say right now. except that i beat special cup on 150cc in mario cart. roflz. yea... that aboot all ive got for todays show folks, and hopefully i'll be back soon to talk to you, my adorable fans. this is Tommy Rigby, signing off. have a good night. and look me up some time on cs, my tag is {B1-5}ST//Hippie{B5-1} or on aim: AMDSkaterNerd (if i ever get ungrounded [you don't wanna know] ). peace evrybody. back to you aleta

Ok... wow yeah.. some would call us bored, some insane but it's all good and i'll be back later with pics and by late i mean hella later cause i'm going camping tell thursday ahhhhh (can't you tell i'm looking forward to it) basically it's the 7th circle of hell located luckily outside chelan with lovley girls to spend time with that I haven't seen in forever and beyond. Bye!

dock+sun+him=good times

Thu, 01 Jul 2004 06:20:04 GMT

... *blush* things seem so beautiful

he kissed me on the cheek

why does he have to live where he does

he was great, these days have been great

<3

Wed, 30 Jun 2004 16:55:07 GMT

if anyone wants to find me this summer i'll be here

jumping off this

i'll be the girl who looks like this

and i'll be with some of these people

or i could possably be eating some

(which i love)

or looking at the

or i might even look like this

when i smell these

and on friday i'll go to my grandparents where me and my brother play "nice" games

when i'm there i always

like these

when i'm there i tend to learn and

we drive at night and see lots of

mark made me want to write something last night so i did, not too great but i like it

aged like a sweet wine

oak leafs in the summer
hold the map to sound point park
each vein a different night
different memory with jade

how long ago it seems
when willows lined the coast
grass rose up to the sky
dirt was black as her hair

she was but a girl
in the county where we lived
and with green eyes like the sea
she grew into a jewel of her own

every night i found her
chasing the surf by the stars
every night we talked
tell the sky leaked the sun

she told me of all the places
that were more beautiful
than the hills of the town
and the sight of the sea

how the fire would sparkle
when it shown across her eyes
the smile that even in the dark
was more brilliant than the moon

that fruitful summer
finally got crisp
and yellow and orange and red
yes it finally got fall

jade moved away that winter
and left me with a note
tacked to her front porch
"follow the oak leaves" she said

she had said this one night
knowing that it wouldn't lead anywhere
it would still lead back to those nights
lead back to those warm summer nights

here's looking at you kid

Sat, 26 Jun 2004 00:10:29 GMT

haven't posted in a while, i guess it just doesn't seem important anymore

i miss thinking things mattered

someone please bring me my <3

i think someone stole it

Thu, 17 Jun 2004 04:18:42 GMT

So for my birthday my family and I went out for sushi (my FAV food) and then cake at my house.

I FINALLY GOT A DIGITAL CAMERA!!!! And if you know what it is, i got a Canon PowerShot A80 (AiAF). My mother didn't want me to get one but my dad went ahead and got me one (i love them both!!)

First Kt helped me open my presents

Then we ate my cake which says "Scooter Turns 15" (and no you don't get to know about my nickname haha)

But it was already 9:30 ish so Kt had to go to her actual home, i made her cake-to-go

TODAY

Me and Katie helped my dad turn in movies... but got side-tracked haha

me and kt lost a lot haha

Then when me and kt got home we went for a walk in my yard and i surprised kt with a handful of seeds... hehe

Then I helped kt while she was doing her homework by doing her hair, and yes i know-it is beautiful!

This was random but i thought it was a cool pic i took (at the grocery store, but who's keeping track haha)

bleep

Tue, 15 Jun 2004 02:01:39 GMT

haha wow, i'm really bad at photoshop! o well

~you mean the world to me~

end of the year

Fri, 11 Jun 2004 04:11:36 GMT

so... a week of finals next week and my birthday is on tuesday... the big 15 (on the 15... oh yeah it's a real "golden" one)

this year went by so fast that i'm afraid all the others will to

i never wanna leave

i never wanna have to grow up because it's scary, and yes it does scare me that i'll be living on my own and have to decide in the next couple years what i will do for the rest of my life

i hate knowing that when i get older or out of high school i'll forget most of these people around me and most of my memories with them

+i remember being 7 and being in california with my family

+i remember being 5 and going to little orca with rachel

+i remember all my sleep overs at kt's house when we watched scary movies and stayed up all night

+i remember times in band class with jen at ov and how we never actually played

+i remember through all those years the fourth of july's and camping trips that i would spend with family members that even flew up here just to be with one another

+and i remember them talking about things just like these

sooner, rather than later, i'll have responsibility and have to look back on these times now instead of live them, and yes; that does scare me.